I had no idea, NO idea, when I first started this blog, what the Lord was up to. I only knew that I was full. So full of his love, and needing a place to express it. So I began this blog, writing each morning the inspirations the Lord had spoken to me in that day’s devotions.
I was on sabbatical. I was at the Alton Bay Christian Conference Center for the summer. The children grown, my husband not yet retired, I was alone. But the Lord spoke with me, daily.
A week earlier, I was returning from an unexpected and plentiful breakfast at the dining hall. I had enjoyed fellowship and song with others, and a workshop on “Hearing God’s Voice”. I knew I had heard his voice often, many different times. Not audibly, but in all those wonderful ways he speaks to us by his Spirit.
I was full.
I told the Lord so. He said, “You ARE full. Feed the hungry.”
It struck me. It was as if he had literally just walked up beside me and said that out loud.
I had no idea. NO idea.
I thought he meant spiritual food. The Lord is so generous. He had poured into my lap, shaken what he had poured, tamped it, and poured in even more all through the summer. And so gladly I wrote. I wrote a series of workshops, based on a seminar I had attended. I wanted to feed others out of the blessings he had poured into me. I started planning a women’s retreat. I began this blog.
And yet I realize today, I had no idea. It wasn’t only spiritual food he had in mind when he told me to feed others. And he knew I had no idea. I can just see him now, smiling over that, as I wrote.
I had seen his love expressed through Trades of Hope. I recognized his love that reached out to the women who had made the pieces of Trades of Hope jewelry I had purchased the previous spring. Every time I had put them on over the summer, I had thanked God for the lives of these women, and prayed for them.
The same week I was blogging, I came to a slow realization that God’s love permeated Trades of Hope. For a people in a distant land, his heart moved with compassion, he caused people here to help them. And he showed his love not only in a distant land, but here as well, providing for those who partnered with Trades of Hope.
And I knew, just knew, that I wanted to do more than just buy Trades of Hope jewelry. I wanted to be even closer to God’s love expressed through Trades of Hope. I wanted to be where he was. I saw what he was doing, and I wanted to be a part of it with him.
I became a Compassionate Entrepreneur with Trades of Hope. Today, reading through my blog entries in the sequence I wrote them, I can clearly see that step by step through that week he was leading me to become a CE, I had been on a path straight as an arrow as he prepared the way, and prepared my heart.
I’ve been a CE for a month now, and have finally realized what he meant that long ago day. When he told me to feed the hungry, he meant that I would be feeding physically and even spiritually hungry people in far off lands, through Trades of Hope.
Today I say to the Lord:
I see what you did there…I like how you do things.
For it is God
who works in you
to will (God’s desire is expressed)
and to act (God gets it done)
in order to fulfill his good purpose. (Phil 2:13).
My prayer: Forgive me, Lord Jesus, for the times when I’ve thought that I should live for you, as if you couldn’t live for yourself. Lead on, oh King Eternal.